Strengthening Ties With Grandparents

(ARA) - Seniors today, many of whom are grandparents, are living longer than ever. Many, because of serious physical and sometimes mental impairments, will spend at least a part of their lives in nursing homes. Like all proud grandparents, these individuals want to impart encouragement, wisdom and love onto their grandchildren. Unfortunately, all too often there are no grandchildren -- or other relatives for that matter -- living nearby.

According to nursing home leader Beverly Healthcare, apart from health problems, the biggest challenge those in nursing homes face is loneliness. Although residents receive skilled, compassionate care and can enjoy the company of others in their age group, nothing takes the place of a visit from a loving family member or friend. Having witnessed many of the most significant events of the twentieth century, this growing elderly population also has a wealth of unique personal experiences to share. Yet sadly, it is estimated that as many as 60 percent of nursing home residents never have a visitor.

Beverly Healthcare offers these suggestions to make visits with your loved one or special new friend meaningful and enjoyable:

* Don't worry about what to say -- simply chatting about your everyday activities will put you both at ease. Often, words are unnecessary; even a patient who is not mentally alert can respond to the warmth of a smile or a reassuring pat on the hand.

* Express genuine interest. Ask questions about his or her family history, childhood memories, work experiences or hobbies.

* Join in the nursing home's recreational activities. Don't forget your camera -- the next time you visit, surprise your loved one or friend with a framed photograph of the two of you.

* Enjoy discovering each other's likes, dislikes and interests. Read favorite books or poetry, listen to music or take turns choosing videos to watch.

If you live far away from a parent or grandparent who is in a nursing home, you already know how challenging it can be to stay close throughout the year. The following tips will help your loved one feel he or she is still an important member of the family:

* Send an attractive calendar highlighted with special family dates, along with pre-paid long distance calling cards and stamped, self-addressed envelopes or post cards.

* A personal computer can keep your loved one up-to-the minute with e-mail messages, a family Web page, even CDs with family photos. Recognizing the positive impact of e-communications, selected Beverly Healthcare homes make e-mail services available for residents.

* Your senior will treasure videotapes of family birthday or holiday celebrations, dance recitals, or your little ones saying bedtime prayers.

* Much-needed socks or a cozy sweater are always thoughtful, but consider gifts that are more individual, too. For instance, although no longer able to actively participate in gardening, ballroom dancing or woodworking, your loved one may enjoy magazine subscriptions or videos related to his or her specific interests.

Your time and attention cost nothing, yet to millions of elderly men and women in nursing homes they are priceless gifts.