Online Dating Tips
by Frank Duru

Finding your soul mate online is a wondrous thing; however, there is the potential for danger. While you have access to a wide variety of people, you also have the impending complication of meeting those who are not what they seem to be--there are some tips of the trade, though, to help you become more discerning with your choices. These tips can help you stay safe and stay away from men and women who are not what you’re looking for.

Tip One: Start Slowly. There are all kinds of people on the Love Empire; not all of these people, however, will be right for you. Take your time--if you meet someone and start up a conversation, proceed with discretion. The person at the other end may not be who they claim to be; take your time and watch for inconsistencies or odd behavior. If something bothers you, simply walk away. Do not rush into any relationship without thinking first. Tip Two: Protect Your Identity. One of the benefits of dating online is that you can get to know someone based solely upon their personality and not deal with the more social conscious real world. It is up to you to decide when and how you reveal who you really are--be careful, however. If someone receives your personal information, they could use it against you. If a member tries to pressure you into giving out your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information, then walk away. Tip Three: Use Common Sense. When speaking to someone through the Love Empire, do not throw good judgment away simply because this is an online service. What may sound wonderful on the screen can be masking something not so wonderful in reality. Use caution and do not fall in love with the first profile you read. Take your time and go through all of your potential choices. Then, after you’ve researched enough, go from there. It is a common occurrence for people to “fall in love” after only one conversation. Do not do this! Retain your common sense and view online dating as you view real-world dating. You do not have to love every profile you read.

Tip Four: Request A Photo. If you meet someone, chat with them, and see the beginning of a relationship forming, then you might want to request a photo. Often, this can tell you more about the person than any email or instant message. First of all, it can keep them from lying about their looks; secondly, you will know if you’re attracted to them in the physical sense; finally, if they continually refuse to send a photo, there might be a reason other than embarrassment. Proceed carefully.

Tip Five: Pay Attention. This is, possibly, the most important tip you could follow. In an email, any one can sound wonderful--in real life, it’s much more difficult. When you are becoming involved with someone on the Love Empire, watch for ‘red flags’, or odd behavior. For example, if during an online session, your date suddenly becomes angry or aggressive toward you and then, won’t explain why, you should take this into consideration. If one sentence could upset him/her in such a way, it might be cause to worry. Also, pay attention to any attempts to pressure or control you. For instance, if your date is constantly making demeaning comments about you, there is a strong chance that he/she is trying to manipulate you into feeling inferior; therefore, you become an easier target to control. Finally, watch out for inconsistencies with information that your date provides you or evasive answers to questions. If your date displays any of the following problems, it would be well-advised to reconsider your relationship:

1. He/she provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc.
2. He/she refuses to speak to you on the phone after you have established an
3. online relationship; or, he/she will only speak on a strangely specific
4. timeframe.
5. He/she will not answer any direct questions about themselves. They will
6. either give you a vague answer or will simply turn the question back to you.
7. He/she will only provide photos of large groups of people, making it
8. impossible for you to find them.

Online dating can be an exciting and fulfilling part of your life; just remember to follow these tips and act accordingly.